There are certain places that can shapeshift my certainty into shapeless sand. Places like the children’s section of a bookstore, or the corner by the bookshelf in the mosque, bring me to contemplate the things worth living for. It makes good sense, for there is a common root in the child and spiritual one, both are embodiments of what is innate, and what can only be tarnished by the loss of innocence or the negligence of guarding one’s energy.
There are verses from the Quran that can strip my ego of its worldly embellishments, and the dancing thick sound of an oud being strum that can move me to tears in gratitude for God’s gift of hearing.
But if I am uncareful, there too, are certain forms of music that have a way of fabricating my truth—turning reality into an enjoyable delusion in which I forget my sense of self. Profane lyricism or careless nudity can with time, plaque the heart. This is old news of course, but a reminder to myself first and foremost.
Do not get me wrong, good lyricism is poetry, and nudity can be done in self-love and respect, but as with anything, it is about the context, and therefore the energy in which you permit to enter your ears, eyes and all other windows. These are windows to the heart, the cage of your essence. Heighten your awareness and do not let the net of your unconscious span so large that it catches anything and everything with such disregard. Learn to be more selective and in tune with how your heart fluctuates in response to your surroundings. This is the start.
Last night was probably the first time I ever challenged my purpose. I’ve lived each day with my ambitions as far from the abstract as one’s jugular vein—within me and sustaining me. It’s a beautiful thing, to know exactly what you want. Vision is the antidote to the one who wastes time. For how can you move with purpose if you do not yet see your purpose?
But as of last night, I’ve come to realize two things about the fragility of purpose:
1. The concept of self-revival emphasizes that we do not have to be who we were yesterday. Our previously self-defined purposes are not definite, for as we grow into our life experiences, we should not be closed off to the idea of our purposes potentially changing.
2. At the same token, if we strive to maintain a single purpose, then the journey is about accepting the different routes, for although our vision is concrete, the ways of getting there are fluid.
There are two journeys to self, one in which the vision is fluid and one in which the route is fluid.
Not everyone realizes their purpose. Some people live in accordance with expectation, and some in a result of limited opportunity—both in which are sometimes in tragic harmony.
I must note that our purpose is not synonymous to our essence. Our self-defined purpose is subject to change, whereas our essence is more abstract and entirely distinctive. Two people can potentially have the same purpose but the cannot share the same essence. Our essence steers us to our purpose. And if you want to gain clarity of your purpose, heighten your awareness and detox your energy. In doing so, you’ll create a safe space within yourself, free of societal expectations and checkboxes. Perhaps you’ll realize that your previously declared purpose is different, or maybe it’s the same and you’ve just now accepted the liberation in knowing there are abundant ways to achieve the same thing. It is about being true to your essence and achieving what you want in the way that is integral to you.
Peace and Blessings,